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Name: Detective MARVIN FLUTE
Description: Flute (40, White) is a darkly brilliant cop obsessed with the job, tortured by his past, and brooding like a gargoyle -- but he makes big romantic overtures to his beloved ex-wife Harmony. Flute's crime-solving mind is powered by trauma (“The incident!”), a 7-Eleven Big Gulp full of cough syrup, and a deep admiration for Katy Perry’s early albums. He also happens to be an expert in rare furniture styles. He'll tell you in a voice of pure gravel that his life is a torrent of unremitting bleakness and despair. But deep down, the guy sure believes in Love.
Last Seen: Writing a heartfelt love letter to Harmony with the blood of his pet bedbugs.
Name: HARMONY FLUTE
Description: The naturally glamorous Harmony (late 30s, White) was born to be a star -- but she's lived in the shadow of others her whole life. When she was little, her parents adopted a Grizzly bear cub, and all of her birthdays had to be shared with "Bearic" dressed in Harmony's jeans.
It ate her cake and then her parents, and it scarred
her emotionally and literally. Known locally as "the
ex-wife of Grimsburg's greatest detective," and "that
girl whose family that Grizzly devoured," Harmony
goes to ridiculous lengths to prove she deserves the
spotlight herself, such as becoming a hotshot TV
reporter, winning axe-throwing contests, and single-
handedly assembling an IKEA bookshelf even though it
says it takes two people.
Last Seen: Hunting for Bearic so she can mount
his head over her aromatherapy bowl.
Name: Detective GREG SUMMERS
Description: Det. Summers (30s, Black) is a chubby and cuddly by-the-book cop, Midwest-nice, cheerful and bubbly, and also a cyborg -- who can foam up your latte with a mechanical finger-whisk. He lost over 70% of his body in a freak merry-go-round accident at the Grimsburg Fair, but with his new cybernetic enhancements, he’s stronger and chipperer than ever before. While Flute's family is badly fractured, Summers is a happily-married family man with twin daughters, just loving every day on the job. Why let a gory triple homicide in a walk-in freezer get you down? Life is good!
Last Seen: Meditating in the McDonald’s playpen ball-pit with a big smile on his face.
Name: DR. RUFIS PENTOS
Description: Dr. Pentos (60s, White) was doing forty-to-life in prison -- but now teaches 6th Grade at the local middle school, thanks to a teacher shortage and the Grimsburg Prison's overly generous Work-Release Program. His attempts to be seen as a sinister criminal mastermind are often thwarted by 1. all the papers he still has to grade, 2. his prankster pupils who super-glue his pants to his chair or write "Dr. Prick-nose" on the chalkboard, and 3. the weekly PTA meetings. Thirty years ago Pentos gleefully tortured Flute in class, and he still serves as Flute's dark mentor, dropping enigmatic hints about Grimsburg's most twisted crimes. Also, if Dr. Pentos could report to admin right away, Linda just found a misplaced comma in his syllabus. Thanks.
Last Seen: Trying to wriggle out of his ankle
bracelet monitor in the Faculty Break Room.
Name: LT. JOHN KANG
Description: Lt. Kang (60, Asian-American) is a 40-year veteran of the Grimsburg Police Department, and if you asked his dead wife when she was still his alive wife, she would’ve told you that Lt. K. is a born police officer. He's the only cop who knows how to handle the loose cannon that is Flute: he's the "Flute Whisperer." Lt. K. is world-weary and perpetually on the verge of collapse, but he keeps dragging his carcass to work every day because... what else is there?
Last Seen: Filing reports and debating whether to bump up his dose of happy pills.
Name: STAN FLUTE
Description: Stan Flute (12, White) is smarter than his years, emotionally mature, and desperately yearning for his parents to reunite. In fact, he'll manipulate both mom and dad to make it happen. He's got glasses. Freckles. And his overt, cape-wearing weirdness makes him the natural target of every
bully in school. He's in therapy but it's not
helping -- that is, not if his imaginary friend has anything to say about it.
Last Seen: Getting spanked in the Principal’s
office for something Mr. Flesh did.
Name: MR. FLESH
Description: Who cares if he doesn't really exist? The velour-jacket-wearing Mr. Flesh is the snazziest imaginary skeleton ever to inhabit a pubescent boy's skull. In the same way that the imaginary friend Hitler in JOJO RABBIT is both an oddball and totally sincere, Mr. Flesh is both a bitchy diva who bombed on Broadway and a truly good friend to young Stan. He's the insane dead older brother Stan never had, always trying to coax the boy
to come out of his shell... and to stop taking
his psych meds… and to pull various fire
alarms and call in bomb threats and do all the
evil things he shouldn’t. But in a way, Mr. Flesh believes in Stan as much as Stan believes in
him. Awww.
Last Seen: Nowhere. He doesn’t exist,
remember?
Name: WYNONA WHITECLOUD
Description: Wynona (30s, Native American) is the "fun" Medical Examiner, always ready with a stale joke from the "How to Be Funny" self-help book
she found at the swap-meet. She doesn't have a lot of friends, so spends time pouring her heart out in one-sided convos with the mangled
corpses at the Grimsburg Morgue. Hungry for human
connection, Wynona invites all sorts of people
(anyone with a pulse) out on friend-dates, but
nobody ever bites. When it comes to romance,
Wynonna only has eyes for Lt. Kang: she's hot for
aging widowers. Anyway, if you happen to be passing
by the morgue, just drop in for some herbal tea,
anytime, really. Or she could bring it over to your
place. Are you free today or this week or next week
or the one after that?
Last Seen: Swiping right, a lot.
Played by Jon Hamm
Played by Kevin Michael Richardson
Played by Erinn Hayes
Played by Alan Tudyk
Played by Alan Tudyk
Played by Rachel Dratch
Played by Keone Young
Played by Tiio Horn
